Moody Monday...

Tomorrow, January 19th, will be the most depressing day if the year. The third monday of January is called Blue Monday. The reason scientists are calling this Monday so depressing is that mostly the weather condition are not optimal, less money because a rather expensive December month and failing to succeed the New Year's resolutions due to a lack of motivation. Personally I would prefer calling this day "Moody Monday", due to moodiness and not depression. Unfortunately I know what depression is, and there are a few more things nessecary, before you get it.

With Monday near, we all need a cheer up right. Well, what's better for that then a little dance? With the same title, as the Monday that comes, the British band "New Order" released a dancable popsong in the year 1983. Enjoy a dancable Blue Monday...

Black and the Day...

When I was watching television I heard the 2 words black and combined together. Hmmm, in my ears it sounds like a very very bad Friday. The word black can have the reputation of darkness. And I'm certainly not speaking about black people, because I do believe that they are the most colorful people in the world. A mysterious color black can be. In Europe we have this event called Black Saturday. A day where you shouldn't go on the streets with your car. It means that you shouldn't go on holiday to France at that moment, because your road will take a long time due to a traffic jam. Not a normal one though, but the longest in a year. Everyone who got their summerholiday blessing on Friday wants to go to the holiday destination as quikly as possible. And in Europe it means heading South.

There have been many Wall Street Crashes, a black Monday, Tuesday and a Thursday. Wall Street is saving the days instead of money! But what is this Black Friday thing which keeps all the American housewifes out of their shimmering homes? After the day where this nation thank for the real important things in life (Thanksgiving), it's time for shopping. No turkey's will be bought between Thanksgiving and Christmas. The housewifes shop the turkey pounds off while shopping. This Friday after Thanksgiving is the start of the Christmas shopping season. The big stores open very early in the morning and they decorated their store in the Christmas theme. All the craziness in people comes to the surface on this day, in that way it's Crazy Friday as well. As it is there only oppurtunaty to shop the wanted Christmas gifts. But yes, if you want amazing discounts, it is. But the crowded shops, where people are almost fighting to get what they want, is not the kind of shopping I like. It would drive me insane! I prefer Cyber Monday, which is today. The internet Christmas season can start with my first gift. 24 Redemption, without discount. But isn't Jack Bauer worth it?

Pumpkin' Delight...

Yesterday Ireland, United Kingdom, USA, Canada and Australia celebrated Halloween last Friday. Throught television and movies the rest of the world is known with this scary feast where it's all about wearing a witch- or ghostcostume, haunting around, bonfires where scary stories get shared, candy trick-and-treat at frontdoors and watching horror movies. The symbol of Halloween are the craved pumpkins lit by a candle inside. Some pumpkins are so big they weight over 500 pounds/225 kilogram. And believe me I tried to hug a giant pumpkin and failed in trying. Pumpkins are not only to be used for the Halloween parties, decoration are for "Giant Huggin' " ,but can also be used in recipies. Enjoy making a combination of 2 Northern American traditions put together...

Read more about the Halloween tradition on wikipedia

Pumpkin, Raisin, and Spice Muffins with Molasses Glaze
Nonstick spray

Ingredients for 18 muffins or 9 large muffins:

2 3/4 cups all purpose flour
1 1/2 teaspoon baking soda
1 teaspoon salt
1 cup sugar
1/2 cup vegetable oil
3 large eggs
1 1/2 tablespoon fresh ginger juice, best done with a garlic press
1 15-ounce can pure pumpkin, or 2 cups of well roasted pumpkin puree
1 tablespoon cinnamon, ground
1/2 teaspoon nutmeg, ground
1/2 teaspoon allspice, ground
1/2 cup buttermilk
1/2 cup plus 1 1/2 tablespoon molasses
1 cup golden raisins

1 1/2 cups powdered sugar
1/8 teaspoon salt
1 1/2 tablespoon water, plus extra if necessary

Preperation:
Preheat the oven to 350 degrees. Grease butter in the muffin tins, so the muffins won't stick. Sift together the flour, baking soda, cinnamon, nutmeg, allspice, and salt. In a separate large bowl, beat together the sugar and the oil, with either a hand whisk or an electric beater. Then, add the eggs one at a time, beating after the addition of each egg until the egg is completely combined. Once all the eggs have been added, add the ginger juice, pumpkin, buttermilk, molasses and raisins to the bowl and whisk/beat thoroughly. Next whisk in the dry, sifted ingredients, added 1/4 at a time. Be sure to whisk the flour mixture just enough to combine - the more you beat the flour, the tougher the muffins will be. Fill the muffin tins to about a centimeter from the top with the batter. Bake in the upper 2/3 of the oven for about 40 minutes if you’re using the large tins, and about 30 minutes if you’re using the regular sized tins, or until a toothpick stuck in the middle of a muffin comes out mostly clean. Removed the finished muffins from the oven and set the tins on a rack to cool. After about an hour the muffins will be cool enough to remove from the pan.

After removing the muffins from the pan, make the glaze. Sift the powdered sugar and salt into a medium sized bowl. Add 1 1/2 tablespoon molasses and 1 1/2 tablespoon water. Whisk. If the glaze seems too thick, add a little more water, if it seems too thin, add more sifted powdered sugar.

Dip the tops of the cooled muffins into the glaze, which will drizzle down the sizes. Allow the glaze to set for about an hour before serving. Enjoy!

Recipe and picture taken from http://www.whatwereeating.com/ .

(Un)Fear That Emotion...

Afraid...Are you afraid of heights? Are you ever afraid of being alone, with noone around to to surround you with love? Are you afraid of spiders? Are you afraid to get closed in an enclosed spaces? Are you afraid that you will lose people you deeply love? Are you afraid that you won't be able to pay the rent? Are you afraid to get involved in a car accident? Are you afraid of pain? Are you afraid you get infected with bacteriums when you don't wash your hands after every activity? Are there situations where you feel trapped in a mousetrap?

Personally I'm not afraid of dead, but I'm afraid of people leaving me. It hurts to think of not having my family and friends around me. But I know that saying goodbye is part of life. I'm afraid people are disappointed in me, that I can't live up there expectations. People love me for who I am, I know that, but I can't let that feeling go. I'm afraid of losing the total control of myself, that I get insane. I have a big fear to ride my car behind a van loaded with tree trunks. I got that fear after seeing the movie "Final destination 2."

Fear... in a way it doesn't help to live in a future you made black with your own thoughts. But nothing can be made up so real in your mind as fear. Fear is a survival mechanism that protects you when you are in danger. It warns you to escape from the situation you're afraid of. But in some situations there is no door to go throught and for you to leave the stage.

But fear is an emotion. And I know that humans are capable of influence their emotions. The things we're mostly afraid of are not impending dangers. Sometimes it is, and your fearlevel warns you and helps you to get out and protect yourself if it's possible. Some fears will overcome us, as a lifelesson. If it doesn't kill you, it will make you stronger. Other fears are to control, simply by not letting yourself go in that particular situation. Then there are fears that you can overcome. When I was a child I had swimminglessons. And in one of those lessons I had to jump of the high diving board. Little Jade didn't want to jump, I was so afraid. But because of the influence the other kids watching me I did jump. And I loved it right away. Sometimes you fear the unknown.

Living in the present helps and knowing that there will be things in life we can't control, but are too overcome. Sometimes you cannot do that alone, I got help too. A teacher once told me, "Not be able does not excist." That sentence helps me, maybe it brings you further in controlling your fear...

Click here to read a good article about the scent of fear.

Celebrate with Sugar...

Today it's the end of the Ramadan month, the ninth month for Muslims. The month from fasting, they eat and drink before the sun comes up their pre-dawn meal and fast till the sun goes under. Muslims fast also in sexual activities and give whatever they can miss to the poor. It's the month of enlighting. The end of the Ramadan month is the start of a big celebration that will last for 3 days. It starts with the prayers in the Mosque. Celebration starts with presents and lots of delicious sweet food. It's called the Eid ul Fitre feast (Sugarfeast).

My friend Harika comes from Turkey and she's a Muslim. Together with her I want to stand still with her religion. Celebrate Sugarfeast with Harika, with traditional food from Turkey. Read about it here.

Guzleme...

Borek...Baklava...Arabic Tea...

Ingredients

• 2 pounds phyllo dough (approx. 40 sheets)
• 6 ½ cups finely chopped walnuts
• 1 ½ cup sugar
• 1 ½ tablespoon ground cinnamon
• ¾ pound unsalted butter (melted)
• 2 ½ cups honey
• 1 tablespoon lemon juice

Preparing:

Grease a 13×9 pan (bottom & sides) and set aside.

Mix well the walnuts, sugar and cinnamon in a bowl and set aside.

Preheat oven to 300 degrees. Place a pan of water on the bottom rack.

Note: When working with phyllo be sure to work fast and keep the unused portion covered with plastic wrap at all times, as it tends to dry out pretty fast. Also, be sure to carefully follow the defrosting instructions on the phyllo - the sheets will stick together if you try to do a “speed defrost”.

Set aside one full-size sheet of phyllo dough. Cover with plastic wrap.

Cut remaining phyllo sheets into 13×9 sheets. Actually, measure your pan and cut the sheets to match the actual inside dimensions. On my pan it is actually 12″ x 8″, for example. With a big sharp knife you should be able to cut all of the phyllo at the same time. You will most likely have a lot of left over phyllo - consider finding another dish where you could use the smaller pieces of leftover phyllo dough.

Carefully lay the full-size phyllo sheet into the greased pan, folding over the pan edges. With a pastry brush, liberally apply melted butter.

Lay a cut sheet of phyllo into the bottom of the pan, and with a pastry brush liberally apply melted butter. Repeat 9 more times, so that you have the one full sheet and 10 smaller sheets as your bottom layer.

Sprinkle 2 cups of the walnut mixture into the pan.

Lay 6 more sheets of phyllo on top, making sure to liberally apply the melted butter between each sheet. Repeat this 3 more times, so that you have 4 separate layers of the walnut mixture. For the top layer place as many phyllo sheets on top as you have remaining, again making sure to liberally butter between each sheet.Using a sharp plastic spatula, carefully fold over the large sheet of phyllo that should still be extended over the edge back onto the top, so that you can see down the inside edges of the pan. In effect you now have one big baklava package wrapped with your initial phyllo sheet.Using a very, very sharp serrated knife, carefully score the baklava into whatever shape you want. A diamond pattern is the traditional shape. Try to cut about half-way down into the baklava when you do this.

Bake for 2 ½ to 3 hours at 300 degrees until nice and brown.

About 5 minutes before removing the baklava from the oven, combine the honey and lemon juice and heat over a medium heat until runny. Do not boil it, just heat it well so it has a consistency more like water.

Remove the baklava from the oven and very carefully drain the butter that it will no doubt be floating in.

Set the baklava on a cooling rack, and pour the honey mixture completely over it.
Cover the baklava and let sit for at least 4 hours. Overnight is best (if you can wait that long!)

When you are ready to cut the pieces, cut through the score marks with a sharp knife, and use a spatula to remove the pieces. Have patience with this step, if you are not careful here you can make a real mess of it!

You are done, enjoy the fruits of your labor. Recipe comes from this website.

My First Love...

We all remember our first love. The butterflies that went on a circling round in your tummy. The red cheeks when he passed by. My first love was so cute, as young and small he was he loved to keep his thumb in his mouth. With his freckels on his cheeks, his big brown eyes with the long eyelashes and let's not forget his adorable feet. I was very much in love...

Growing older there I saw him again... The same big eyes that found mine, when I noticed him throught the display window. I felt the blush on my cheeks. Carefully looking at Monchichi I notice I'm not the only one. It looks like he's still single, just like me, I think relieved. It wouldn't be so strange to see him married with 5 little apes on his side. Quikly I go into the toyshop. I see all the brothers and sisters of Monchichi exhibit. But I only want MY Monchichi. I ask the salesgirl for the one in the display. She tells me it's the same. But not for me, there is only one Monchichi! A bit later I walk outside with MY first love. I need to cuddle him, so he smells like he used to do...

Uniqueness of Being Normal...

As I was telling a friend that I was glad not to be normal, the question about what is normal popped up in my head. To get that answer I need to know what normal behaviour means.

If I drive my car on the right side of the road in Holland I would show not normal behaviour. In my country we agreed to be driving on the left side of the road. In England my behaviour wouldn't have raised eyebrows, as it is normal behaviour there. What the values are in one country can be totally different on other places on earth. Normal behaviour is cultural determined.

Wikipedia tells me: "In behaviour, normal refers to a lack of significant deviation from the average." But what is avarage behaviour?

We people surround us with people we can identify with. As being a Kiefer Sutherland fan, I have surrounded myself with people who feel the same. We chat, make art and share pictures with eachother. In this group we see this as normal behaviour. Not feeling the same, another person will see our behaviour as not normal.

My family, friends, colleges and the people in my country do think I behave pretty normal. We have agreed on what is normal with eachother. Being not a member of one of my groups you could see my behaviour as not normal. I'm okay with that, because I feel safe in my world...